The bad comes with the good.
My regular season was a good regular season. My postseason was not. The thing to remember is that if you put your heart into it, if you care, if it means something to you, it’s going to hurt. I don’t think I would want it any other way. If I was sitting here and didn’t feel anything right now, then I need to do something else. That’s a waste of my life of putting it all on the line. That’s kind of what the role is all about. It’s feast or famine.
It’s also important for other people to understand that if you go out there and get a loss, blow a save, it’s not so much that you hurt for yourself. Feeling sorry for yourself, I’ve always said is a waste of energy. You can’t do anything to change it. But the energy and the time and the love that you put in for your teammates, that’s what makes it hurt. That makes worth it, too.
On the flip side, the other team, whoever that is, unless you win your last game, the other team is celebrating. That’s why we play. We show up at the beginning of the season to win the World Series.
At first you feel numb to it, because it’s a shock. That’s what me sitting on the bench was at first. But after I came out of the game, we still had three outs to play. So you’re still trying to figure out a way to help your team win. I was on the top step, cheering our guys on. It’s not over until it’s over, obviously. You’ve seen that a lot in this postseason. Weakness is quitting at that point. Weakness is feeling sorry for yourself.
Weakness is expecting people to pat you on the back. You appreciated it. Does it help? Not really? Does it hurt? No. Then do you appreciate it? Absolutely.
When it’s over, some people sit in the dugout, dwell on it. To me, I don’t sit out there for too long. It’s over. My team is in the clubhouse, so that’s where I go.
Those next five minutes are probably the worst, worse even than Ryan Howard’s game-tying double or Werth’s ball falling in for the go-ahead run. Those are the worst moments, just because there is nothing left that you can do.
But you go into the offseason, you learn from it. For me, I realize how special a year it was for this group of people.
And 2010, that’s all that’s left to put your energy toward.